Running

So today…I ran 10 miles…

Needless to say, I think my half marathon training is going pretty well! The half is on April 14th and I’m already up to 10 miles!

However, getting to this point has not been easy.  I had a really bad run on Saturday that I thought was going to be a mental roadblock for me.  I set out to run 4 miles and after reaching the mile point, my body just could not do it anymore.  I have had this happen many times before and it was a constant problem for me when I ran high school cross country, but I can honestly say it has not happened to me recently.  I began to walk and my disappointment turned into tears.  Lots of tears.  A full on meltdown on the side of the road.

I took a 10 minute ish breather and then started again.  I made it about a block and then had to stop again.  I diverted down a side street that I knew would take me back home and called my mom.  Thank goodness for that wonderful woman! She calmed me down and had me think logically about everything that could have been going wrong and what lead to this horrible run.  When I reached the point that I was about a mile away from home, I stopped and sat down to talk to her.  She suggested that I do a light jog the rest of the way home and I took her suggestion.  I started off again and soon my disappointment turned into sheer anger.  When I reached the point where I needed to turn right to go home, I turned left and ran another 2 mile loop.

I had to hide what was happening from my roommate, because she is not a very supportive individual when it comes to my running and I knew she would take it as an opportunity to belittle me or just say “that’s not good” like she always does when I open up to her about my running struggles.  She just doesn’t relate at all, simple as that.

Keeping it in started to give me lots of anxiety.  I had a really good 4 mile run on Tuesday and figured it was a sign I could attempt 10.  Of course, I started off too fast this morning. I ALWAYS do that when I have any sort of anxiety about a run and unfortunately, I was running too far to keep up my initial pace.   The last two miles were tough.  I contemplated allowing myself to just run 9 again and try 10 next week.  I’m glad I convinced myself otherwise because it was nice to know I added another mile successfully.

I’m gonna try for 10 again next Thursday! Then build to 11 the week after that. Wish me luck!!!

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